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This material is provided courtesy of Virginia Department of ABC in the "Parental Guide to Hosting Responsible Teen Parties".

See the full brochure at
www.abc.virginia.gov

Parental Guide to Hosting Responsible Teen Parties - Link opens new window at www.abc.virginia.gov
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Parental Responsibility


Send a Clear Message - It's All About What You Say or Don't Say.

You may not want to embarrass or alienate your teen by discussing the issue of underage drinking. But drinking and driving is only one of the many problems associated with illegal underage alcohol use. Other potential problems are unplanned sexual activity, pregnancy, sexually transmitted diseases, alcohol poisoning, and sexual assault. Before sending your teen out to a party, talk to him or her about the consequences of using alcohol while underage. It is far better to be safe than sorry.

  • Be prepared to talk about the issue of underage drinking. Take some time to really think about what you want to say and key points to go over with your teen. Anticipate how your teen might respond to your questions. Remember teens do not want a lecture. You do not need to cover everything at once. This should be an ongoing conversation with your teen throughout adolescence.

  • Send a clear message that underage alcohol use is not accepted in your home.

  • Keep the lines of communication open.

  • Have your teen practice saying "no" to illegal activities. Discuss ways to get out of uncomfortable situations. Help your teen think of ways to respond when they are offered alcohol. For example, "No, I don't want a beer, I have to stay in shape for my team." or, "Nah, I'd rather have a soda" or just say, "No thanks."

  • Listen to your teen. When you listen, you create a safe environment where your teen will feel comfortable talking with you about his or her concerns.

  • Set firm rules. Make it clear that drinking is illegal under any circumstances until they are over the age of 21. Discuss what the consequences will be if they choose to drink, (i.e., loss of computer/car privileges, phone, dating; and misdemeanor charge if caught).

  • Be alert for possible signs of alcohol use. Watch for problems like dropping grades, withdrawal, missing money, or a new set of questionable friends.

  • Remind your teen of Virginia's "You Use, You Lose" law. If he/she uses, buys or possesses alcohol or drugs, they can lose their driver's license or learner's permit for at least 6 months.

Did You Know?

  • 33% of nearly 200,000 students nationally surveyed said that their parents often do not set clear rules.
  • A study of 9th grade students from four urban high schools showed that the best predictor of risky sexual behavior was alcohol and/or drug use.
  • Teenagers who drink are 22 times more likely to use marijuana.
  • The average age when a teen tries alcohol for the first time is age 11.

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